Submitted by thornysarus on Thu, 2006-01-19 19:12.
The only thing I would add is either some sort of treatment in the background (like you did at the bottom) to give the text blocks at the top something to sit on and some depth. They look odd just "floating" up there. Either that, or bullet them with icons compatible with the art... Maybe just move them to the bottom?
Other than that, this is a great piece! Good work and thanks for sharing!
Kern the word "carnival", and even out the space between the logos along the bottom. I like to see the day of the week next to generic labels like "day 1", "day 2", etc., too. But overall, very nice.
Tigerstorm, your jokes are getting as bad as mine dude....
Foite - Great stuff, I love the general carnival feel to this piece, the only things that I would suggest are:
- Bring the background graphics up a bit so we can see them better.
- Tidy up / soften the edges of the cigars, there are parts where it looks very cut out (I'm sure this is because its a proposed design and not the polished finish lol).
- The cigars, how does it look if you put the lighter coloured cigars to the middle and the darker ones to the outside, and spread the fan out a bit, they feel a bit close together.
- There is a few areas of the piece where there is symmetry and curves, I really like them although is there something you could do with the horns/sharper shapes as the one at the top feels a little out of place.. maybe flip it so its pointing left?
- The blocks of text feel a little squashed in, what if they were placed below the main graphic and dates, above the logos at the bottom, and then you should have more room to work on making the type look as gorgous as the rest of the design!
Just a few things, I hope you didnt mind - I tried to be honest and not harsh for you :)
I think this work you've submitted is really great and I cant wait to see what you do with it next - keep us updated!!!
I really like the colors of composition, in general, you can improve it as jammo already suggested.
It'd be really nice to animate it :)
Growing shapes, palms moved by wind..etc etc
this is great. the whole look of the poster really gives me that 'carnival' feel, but not the old 'run-down' carnival feel. this gives a vibrant, clean, fresh feel. probably something that the cigar manufacturers are looking for... ;)
Oh that's awesome
The only thing I would add is either some sort of treatment in the background (like you did at the bottom) to give the text blocks at the top something to sit on and some depth. They look odd just "floating" up there. Either that, or bullet them with icons compatible with the art... Maybe just move them to the bottom?
Other than that, this is a great piece! Good work and thanks for sharing!
Terry Thornhill
e-zign Design Group
Like it..
The image really brings you the feeling of a Carnival...
Nothing more todo with it I think.. Just print it ;)
But don't go upto smoke while doin it lol..
Very nice
I like it, but the cigars are obscured a bit too much.
How about making some of the graphics got behind and/or wrap around them.
It is all about the cigars, show them just a bit more.
Nice work.
Sliiick
Kern the word "carnival", and even out the space between the logos along the bottom. I like to see the day of the week next to generic labels like "day 1", "day 2", etc., too. But overall, very nice.
Oh man - Tigerstorm's getting worse....
Tigerstorm, your jokes are getting as bad as mine dude....
Foite - Great stuff, I love the general carnival feel to this piece, the only things that I would suggest are:
- Bring the background graphics up a bit so we can see them better.
- Tidy up / soften the edges of the cigars, there are parts where it looks very cut out (I'm sure this is because its a proposed design and not the polished finish lol).
- The cigars, how does it look if you put the lighter coloured cigars to the middle and the darker ones to the outside, and spread the fan out a bit, they feel a bit close together.
- There is a few areas of the piece where there is symmetry and curves, I really like them although is there something you could do with the horns/sharper shapes as the one at the top feels a little out of place.. maybe flip it so its pointing left?
- The blocks of text feel a little squashed in, what if they were placed below the main graphic and dates, above the logos at the bottom, and then you should have more room to work on making the type look as gorgous as the rest of the design!
Just a few things, I hope you didnt mind - I tried to be honest and not harsh for you :)
I think this work you've submitted is really great and I cant wait to see what you do with it next - keep us updated!!!
__
jammindesigns.co.uk
what is the format for this ad layout?
if you're showing us a print ad is this layout for a spread? If it is I'd be careful about the text that's going to be in the gutter.
If it's a 1/2 ad, how small is the body text?
If it is a full page, then either the publication is a unique size or the thing prints rotated vertically on the page.
You've got a really nice piece happening here. Your client will be pleased.
Cool
U can improve better then this!!!
Lovely.
I really like the colors of composition, in general, you can improve it as jammo already suggested.
It'd be really nice to animate it :)
Growing shapes, palms moved by wind..etc etc
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.... you first ;)
Animate something as complex as this?? How much time do you have on your hands Lol!
Although that would be soooooo awesome.
__
jammindesigns.co.uk
it will be
not so hard to animate it...
with a detailed storyboard and elements ready to use...it could be done in 4/5 hours :)
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i'm there...
this is great. the whole look of the poster really gives me that 'carnival' feel, but not the old 'run-down' carnival feel. this gives a vibrant, clean, fresh feel. probably something that the cigar manufacturers are looking for... ;)
Less obscurity
Great-but the cigars are a bit hidden. They should be the main focus not the design around them.
Van
www.vanshea.com