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captonjohn's picture
347 pencils

Clear Vision makes big difference

In this ad an simple person wearing spectacles decide to use contact lens then after his personality get changed & he become a superman.

Think, Act, Invent.
http://www.narendrakeshkar.com

Clear Vision makes big difference

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3dogmama's picture
1994 pencils

I understand what you are trying to accomplish here, but I'm not immediately picking up on how using the product would turn me into a powerful super being. It just looks like Clark Kent turning into the man of steel.

The Superman theme has potential, but I think you need to have more visuals to make it make sense. Add a few more frames...maybe shaped in the form of eyeglass lenses...and work up a comic strip, beginning with a skinny, slooped-over-his-desk bespectacled man and following the transformation from wimp to Superman. Have the final frame with Superman flying with his fist in the air, smashing through the last lens' border.

ttfn!
3dogmama

"Art -- the one achievement of Man which has made the long trip up from all fours seem well advised." - James Thurber

captonjohn's picture
347 pencils

thanks for this great suggestion, I'll execute it in that way soon.

Think, Act, Invent.
http://www.narendrakeshkar.com

Stack's picture
85 pencils

...the no-brains, everyman, product-leeching, TIRED superman appeal...

gwells's picture
1705 pencils

it's treading all over copyright/trademark infringement. and superman wouldn't wear contacts, so it's not quite on the mark anyway. maybe laser vision correction would seem more appropriate.

as far as the visuals, your most important pieces, the sketches, almost get lost.

your typography needs help. you have a widowed line in your second paragraph that just looks lost. and your headline is unnecessarily small, unless you're trying to make people look hard for it, but since contacts are for nearsighted people, not people who need reading glasses, that would seem to be off the mark.

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