Are you bound to this color scheme? It appears a bit dated to me. The sun appeared more like a moon to me, perhaps because of the dark green.

I think a tighter kerning on Oswego might look nicer, and the two lines below
leave an odd white space to the right of "chamber of". It seems Chamber of Commerce should be one unit of info, with the words the same size.

And I think the watermark in unnecessary. Especially on the business card, it just becomes kind of muddled. It'll be cleaner without it.

thank you for the observation. I had used green because the chamber would like to portray a green or "eco-friendly" feel to all of their collateral. I personally like how the watermark came out, but I appreciate any other thoughts on it. Thank you for the other tweak suggestions. I will work on them.

I think you nailed it pretty well. I've worked on a chamber logo in the past with a board and LOTS of opinions.

I'd also try another version: fill the brown road/C in with white; I'm finding that road a little chopped off looking and think it would work better disappearing like the other one into the background. I'd also lighten up on the watermark. Try 7 to 9 per cent values, but also ensure with whomever will do the final print that they can hit and maintain a watermark screen.

"Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible."
— Frank Zappa

Yes. This Chamber is full of "important" people who all have their grand ideas. It is the perfect case of too many chiefs and not enough indians. This is much the situation with my full-time gig so I have gotten used to it. What are you going to do.

Welcome, Kscho77.

At first glance, your logo is smart and effective.

At second glance, a few things worried me. The sun definitely reads as a moon. The divided highway stretching out to nowhere makes me think of the world passing Oswego by, rather then holding our attention on a developing business community. The brown/tan color combination reminds me of hunters' camouflage cloth. The screen ("watermark") serves no purpose. I would encourage you to drop it.

I don't share olliesan1's concern about the point size for "chamber of" relative to "commerce"; in fact, I like the attention it draws to the function of the organization (over the inherent bureaucracy).

Third glance? Pretty good start! Tweak it a bit.

BTW, I totally understand your frustrations with this client. I think chambers of commerce are the same everywhere. Just suck it up and deposit those checks :-)

Mara

It's pretty alright. I'd try some different spot colors. A brighter green, definitely, if they insist on green.

Thank You for the comments. I appreciate it. This project is still in the proposal stages so I will take all of your suggestions in to consideration when or if I go back to the drawing board. I have enjoyed browsing the critique and other sections of this website and I'm glad I finally got involved. This is a great resource for creatives to share ideas and stay sharp on what others are doing in the field. Great work Ivan.

This is in the proposal stages and I haven't yet won the business. I am trying to get other opinions on what I have for them so far.

Thank you for the links. I am fairly un-experienced in working freelance and having to win my own business. The Chamber requested a designer to handle the new branding, collateral, ads, etc. for the year. They did not request to submit spec. work, however I thought the best way I knew how to communicate my ideas was to get a visual down on paper for something to look at. I see that this is not the best way to approach an opportunity like this.

This logo device is everywhere!
The road leading in to the distance, it means nothing really and in my humble opinion only really works for employment agencies and education establishments.