Pro Bono T-shirt design for Atlanta Food Bank
riskart1 (112 points) | Mon, 2009-04-06 19:09I am doing a design for the Atlanta Food Bank for their "Youth Leadership Summit". This is a week long camp for teenagers to learn about hunger and how to stop it, or at least try.
They asked for a shirt that would be "cool" and appealing to teens. They did not have any standards for this program, just for the Atl. Food Bank logo. It is one color. I used the blue in the logo to keep the cost down.
The basic concept is royalty as in leadership, combining elements of dinning to show the concept of "food" and I added a little bit of grunge for the teens.
On the back is a plate with an Atl map which is grunged out also.
feed back please!
Thanks
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first reaction is that your light blue fleur de lis and grunge marks contrast too much with the dark blue and obscure the logo. i didn't actually notice the logo at first, and once i did, i couldn't tell what most of it said.
the grunge feels a little out of place with the fleur de lis. not to mention competing with them as background elements.
try taking out all of the fleur de lis in the background - top & bottom ones are plenty enough...
I don't know... If I was a teen I would think of this as cool. Try something more urban. Something like this: http://www.istockphoto.com/file_closeup/concepts-and-ideas/communication/7522903-music-rebel.php?id=7522903
Take a deep breath. This might hurt a little.
This piece doesn't convey "cool" to me at all. There are far too many elements competing for attention, many of them things associated with tired old institutions as opposed to, say, retro chic, if that's what you were going for.
Throwing "a little bit of grunge" at the background "for the teens"? WTF? I thought the whole design was supposed to be for the teens.
I question the premise (stated not only through the crown but also the fleur de lys, which is historically associated with French monarchy), that royalty equals leadership. While that may make sense in some nations, in this country, "royalty" means the exact opposite of what this whole program is about. I might be willing to cut you some slack if your client were in New Orleans, because of the unique symbolism of King and Queen during Mardi Gras season, but Atlanta? Not gonna fly.
Feeding the hungry and "dining out" are kind of not the same things. Many of the hungriest people of the world live hundreds of miles from the nearest restaurant and couldn't afford it if they could get to it somehow. Also, lots and lots of people eat foods (when they can get them) that are properly eaten with the hands or chopsticks. To show some respect for that, lose the Eurocentric knife and fork.
Start over and keep it simple. Maybe you could check out some Web sites for Indie bands to get an idea of how they translate social consciousness into artistic themes that appeal to kids. Maybe some of the younger designers here could suggest some good ones; that's not really my thing. Think also about this program's goal: empowering people to fill an unmet, but fundamental, human need for themselves and others. Let your design tell that story, but very, very simply, and without all the grandpa baggage.
*clap clap*
"Art -- the one achievement of Man which has made the long trip up from all fours seem well advised." - James Thurber
Leaky Penny
www.leakypenny.com
We artists are indestructible, even in a prison cell or concentration camp I would be almighty in my own world of art. Even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell. - Pablo Picasso
Initial/Main thought...
The Royalty angle I'm really not getting. You have EVERYTHING going on here and you are losing the ATLANTA COMMUNITY FOODBANK logo altogether. I'd try a version with the ACF logo front and center and hit with a solid grunge.
"Art -- the one achievement of Man which has made the long trip up from all fours seem well advised." - James Thurber
My skin got leather hard years ago from critiques, so I appreciate the honest feedback.
I understand what you mean about the crown and fork/spoon implications. I thought of that myself. Atlanta is a very urban city. I live one block from a high school and have seen shirts/designs that have the same sort of look. I do agree that I need to remove the grunge, and simplify the design.
I thought that the spoon and fork would make people think about what they have and what others have not. I know homeless people eat with their hands mostly, but this particular organization works with local churches and other organizations so those provide plates and forks etc.
I am awaiting feedback from the organization as well. I hope this email doesn't seem defensive, I'm just trying to explain my idea a little better. BUT if it doesn't work, it doesn't work and I can't explain myself until it does.
That being said, again, thank you all for your honest feedback! :)
Julie
http://www.luckybirddesign.com
Nope. Doesn't work. Just to refine what I said about people eating with their hands, I wasn't talking about homeless people. I was thinking of cultures in which most foods are intended to be eaten without utensils -- Ethiopia comes to mind, Hawaii, parts of Central and South America (you get the idea) -- or chopsticks. I assume this program has at least one component meant to raise the consciousness of the kids to global hunger issues, not just the local. In that case, it would be cool not to impose a Eurocentric paradigmm on the whole program.
i don't think you should "assume" anything like that. it's a valid question to ask, but it's not a valid presumption to make. solve the client's problem, not one you create in your own head.
Dear Anonymous,
I have to say that my skin isn't that damned thick. I have been doing design for over 10 years. I'm not saying that I know it all, if I did I sure wouldn't ask for anyone's opinion.
THIS IS A LOCAL PROJECT!!!!! The client is not looking to teach these kids in one week all the problems and hunger in the world. They are taking baby steps and trying to get them involved in their own community!
I got the point about the fork and the spoon not being "global" too.
I suggest if you are going to get so rowdy about other people in the world starving, do some pro-bono work yourself and freaking let us all see some of your wonderful life-saving work that you have done. Mr/Ms Anonymous, at least have a backbone to show who you are.
I always try to be constructive and polite on this website, but you hit a nerve on the second email. Enough already.
Like I said I appreciate CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, not a lecture on world hunger and being politically correct, OR criticism based on an "assumption" of what you imagine my client would want. WTF right back to you.
Everyone else, I appreciate the comments! Thank you.
Julie
http://www.luckybirddesign.com
Julie, I'm sorry! I must have posted that without having logged in, which is why my post says "Anonymous." That's pretty rare in my CB experience, so I didn't even notice at the time I posted.
I'm deeply sorry if my assumption that this project has a global theme caused me to make some comments that you found offensive. I was trying to explain why I'd originally thought the fork and spoon didn't represent the scope of the program properly. I apologize for not understanding that this project has a strictly local focus. Part of what clouded my thinking is that we have a similar project in the town where I have my studio. It's run by a Lutheran church and has a "think globally, act locally" slant.
I'll try to be more careful about (a) checking to be sure I'm logged in when I post; and, (b) not making assumptions on things I could easily ask for clarification about first.
For the record, I've done lots of pro bono work in my time and can say without hesitation that it's often the most difficult to do. One of the most frustrating things is that pro bono clients aren't always as forthcoming with helpful details as a paying client would be. Maybe it's because they think we don't want them "making demands" when they're getting the work for nothing. Oh, but there I go making an assumption again! I better shut up before Greg hauls out the duct tape ;-)
Mara
ps: I just noticed that my original post says Anonymous also! Good grief!
Mara
Mara,
Thank you for writing back in such a positive light.
There is something to be said for actually talking rather than email. Emails can be misinterpreted so easily.
It's all good. :)
Julie
http://www.luckybirddesign.com
Thank you, Julie. I realize that I tend to write in a formal way that comes across more harshly than I intend. That style really isn't suited to this medium -- I'll try to offer critiques with a lighter hand in the future. I'll also be sure I'm logged in when I post! There's something extra obnoxious about anonymous snark!
I hope you'll post your alternate design for this client. I'm sure we'd all like to see what our feedback and your creativity have inspired :-)
Mara
from the computer! Breath in, breath out. The comment wasn't that bad.
Leaky Penny
www.leakypenny.com
“What ain't no country I ever heard of. They speak English in What?”
~ Jules Winnfield
Leaky Penny
www.leakypenny.com
We artists are indestructible, even in a prison cell or concentration camp I would be almighty in my own world of art. Even if I had to paint my pictures with my wet tongue on the dusty floor of my cell. - Pablo Picasso
Not working at all for me. Why the shield, crown? Go to a mall. Look at what teenagers are wearing. For what it's worth, this is totally not "grunge".
http://www.choiceshirts.com/for_the_family/teen/
the client stressed the fact that they wanted it to be something they would wear again and actually like it.
i know it still needs some work - based on the feedback I've gotten- I'm doing some other versions.
By the way, just wondering how old are you? are you under 30 or over 30?
Julie
http://www.luckybirddesign.com
Under 30. I dress pretty trendy but was in the grunge look in high school. Just sayin'. :)
K.I.S.S
Jack
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