Salvation Army
johnwdefeo (43 pencils) | Fri, 2008-04-11 21:49
A print advert for the Salvation Army.
—
John W. DeFeo
Brand Development & Creative Solutions
www.johnwdefeo.com
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You had me until the last phrase in your copy. The old "you can help this child, or you can turn the page" entered the advertising lexicon decades ago as cynical shorthand for blatant emotional blackmail in ad copy. Your piece is very effective without that phrase, so I'd advise you to delete it and end on "Will you answer the call?"
With or without the edit I've recommended, you leave unanswered the matter of what action you want to viewer to take. Join the Salvation Army? Donate a sofa to one of their stores? Pitch a buck into the Christmas kettle? ASK FOR THE GIFT. Prime directive for charities.
Mara